Warning: Those who think this is too mushy and fake kindly don’t bother reading.
After reading my close buddy’s blog post about her watching the movie “PS: I love you”, I was determined to watch the movie and then later read the book when I get a chance to get my hands on the book. Guess what – I took all the pains to somehow find the movie online, because even after searching in many sites, I couldn’t get hold of it. Finally I got to watch it completely and I have got to say that I’m impressed with the movie. I mean it’s so sweet…damn sweet I say again :)
Well it’s such a sweet kind of love, a concerned love… Don’t tell me that this doesn’t happen in our world. Anyone out there who would like to argue with me about this? Well you absolutely cannot. I tell you this because – (well before I start off, don’t any of you dare think that it’s crazy) I have felt that way about my hubby. I certainly have because unlike me, I know that he finds it very difficult to live without me. I guess in my case even though I’m extremely sensitive, I know to put a hard look in front of others and keep my grief to myself. But my hubby darling, even though he does put a tough look in front of others, he just doesn’t have it in him to live without me.
I know this may sound crazy, but I have seriously thought many times about writing him long letters to prepare him to get over it and move on in life in case anything happens to me. Many a times, I did get the weird feeling that something might happen and I did start out on writing too. But ya me right, I never got to complete it. Well I guess that was coz, I told myself “na nothing is gonna happen, I wanna have a long life with the love of my life.” After all, he did wait for me for all these years and his love did not decrease one bit even after I behaved very badly with him, was extremely rude, made him cry and did all I could to distance him. Even before the wedding and engagement I was in so much of confusion and all that I hurt him over and over and told I do not wanna marry him. But the great guy that he is, he waited very patiently for me, suffered all the hurt and stood by me. He put up with all my really rude behavior and ultimate madness. People he does deserve a huge award for that I say…Coz u cannot even imagine how cruel I was and that a person can be so coldhearted and bad.(Well the circumstances did make me that way I guess!!!)
I know what I did is really bad, but I was also under so much pressure and was going through a lot of problems. And because of people comments, I was so scared and wondering if I was taking the right decision, if I will regret this and so on and many more problems that I really cannot talk about now. Unlike what many others say, we also didn’t just show a false side of ours to each other while we were seeing each other. I made sure that he saw the kind of crazy nut that I am so that later on he cannot regret being married to me. I made sure that he knew what he was getting into and what he will have to put up with… And even after knowing me completely he stuck on!!!
So how can I say that there is no great love? How can I say that such love does not exist when I myself am experiencing it? He is definitely the stable anchor in my life. He did change me in so many ways, stood by me through all my troubles and problems and hysteria when we were seeing each other. Well I know most guys would have run in the opposite direction at full speed when they got the chance to escape. No he did not do that, he waited for me for 7 long years and is still waiting patiently. (Hehe, that’s coz I had to leave India soon after the wedding to get back to work) Ohh Ya Love at first sight does exist too…not for me anyway but for my hubby :P …But I have come to believe in love (I guess) and all that after this…
Guys, it’s so amazing to have a person in life who understands you completely. He understands even the small change in my moods, knows how upset I am, if I’m happy and all that. Well it’s a little freaky too coz even before I know it, he will know exactly how I feel.
Hey just because I told this much does not mean that life is a bed of roses. We still do drive each other nuts, there are things that we still don’t understand and things that make us go mad and disagree and all that. Ohh ya at times I just feel like kicking his ass and killing him too…But amidst all this also, love does exist strongly. If you had seen the fights that we used to have, then all of you would have decided to never marry in life or have a relationship. And you know what; I do have friends who decided never to fall into a relationship and all after seeing our problems and fights. That was the intensity of our fights …LOL
That’s why I feel that if anything at all happens to me, I want him to move on in life, fall in love again, get a good life again etc. I will never stand to see him in mourning or anything. Well I better stop writing this before I make a mess of myself…hehe…Ohh I just pray to the good lord to be with us and guide us through to have a good life. I just thank him for changing me at least this much and making me a better human being and for giving me the best blessing of my life- My darling hubby “D”… Thank U sweet jesus!!!
N.B: I recently got a chance to travel down to India to meet my hubby and guess what - I finally got a chance to buy the book….. I finally bought the Book “PS: I love you”…. Hurreeyyyyy :)
Set in Ireland, Holly Kennedy is beautiful, smart and married to the love of her life - a passionate, funny and impetuous Irishman named Gerry. So when Gerry's life is taken by an illness, it takes the life out of Holly. The only one who can help her is the person who is no longer there. Nobody knows Holly better than Gerry, so it's a good thing he planned ahead. Before he died, Gerry wrote Holly a series of 10 letters that will guide her, not only through her grief but in rediscovering herself. The messages are Gerry's way of informing Holly life goes on. The messages include various tasks and treats Gerry has left for Holly. This is his way of letting her know he will always be there for her. Each letter sends her on a new adventure and each signs off in the same way: "P.S. I Love You." Holly's mother and best friends, Sharon and Denise, begin to worry that Gerry's letters are keeping Holly tied to the past, but, in fact, each letter is pushing her further into a new future. With Gerry's words as her guide, Holly embarks on a journey of rediscovery in a story about marriage, friendship and how a love so strong can turn the finality of death into new beginning for life.