Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Here’s a classic lengthy tag!

First of all, Swar I’m really sorry for taking up the tag so late. It’s been so crazy lately and had to also make that sudden trip down to India and all so hence was away from the world of blogging for quite some time now… Sorry…so here goes ---

Okkkk, I have been tagged by Swarna (La Belle Dame Sansmerci) and looks like this time the tag contains some complicated questions and its quite a long list of questions too….So here goes:

What have you realized recently?
I have realized many things actually. (The list me shockingly too long and it’s a shocking experience that I am going through too coz I didn’t realize so many things up until now) A few things that relate to my present situation is that - Life is not so easy as you think it is, marriage is not so easy either and now I can understand why people say lots of adjustments are needed, lots of sacrifices are involved etc. I dint know that balancing 2 families, a career, my own life, dreams, aims etc etc are so tough… Well thinking about having to do all this for a lifetime from now does give me the jitters. These are all the realizations that I have come upon now…well there are lots more too, but y bore all u guys with it 

Have you given your first kiss away?
Well looks like you are too late with that question…Ohh ya looong back :P

If you were to be stranded on a deserted island, who are the 11 blog buddies you would take?
Huumm, now that’s a good question…Well if it’s from the few blogs that I have begun to visit regularly and also if its blog buddies who encourage me well, then I think it'll b the following persons as they make me go wild with laughter, make me think a lot and just make me feel so much better after I read their blogs and comments – Preeti(Just mother of 2), Jane (Reflections), Arun (cockroach in cocktail), --XH—(tales of a lone wolf), Keshi (Viva forever), Solitaire , Neetu (wistfully yours), vik (Pass me everything.... Dudleybouy), Meghna (Delve into the Mind of a Budding Blogger), Tessie (The fat lady’s rantings), Thavy Dun and so many more…

Where is the place you want to go the most?
I don’t know about that. But I certainly want to visit most of the European countries and all. And the truth is that wherever I go I wanna come back home as that’s my most treasured place and that’s where I can b myself and b free(It also depends on the kind of place u call home too)…So there is no place like home…

If you have one dream to come true, what would it be?
I don’t dream unnecessarily : P LOL

Do you believe in seeing the rainbow after the rain?
Humm I hope to see. Don’t have much high hopes in that as rain itself is a rare thing here and I just hope that it will rain so heavily at least one day. Well I am a little romantic too, so love that rainy climate and the beauty of rain and the prospect of a rainbow and such.

What are you afraid of losing the most now?
Right now? Nothing!!! Well if it’s about most of the time then lots of things – like my family, the love they give, the love from my hubby and so many other things.

If you win $1 million, what would you do?
Well since I have always been low on luck, let me win and then maybe I will actually think about it…. Humm ohh ya maybe I might visit the places I want to, do things I want to, give lots of it to the people I know want the money, help in making my life a lot more easier etc etc

If you meet someone that you love, would you confess to him/her?
I don’t think I will just meet someone I love. To love a person you should know them well, by that time itself we will know a lot about each other. Well if it’s to a person I love so much, I might tell or confess most of the things, but I have learnt from past experiences that confessing completely is very bad (be it to the one you love, to friends or to ur parents)…heheh and that’s the general advice I hear too…Do not tell what is not needed…hummm well I guess it all depends on who you are confessing too I guess.

List out 3 good points about the person who tagged you
Ahhh Swarna – I have known her since 2003 June and we did have lots of good times as classmates and friends. From my perspective she is -
1. Absolutely fantastic as an overall package.
2. Very talented – she writes so well, is good at everything she does, is very pretty, very intelligent and capable of going places. She is also a very caring person and should have seen her with the HIV affected little kids that we worked with during a PR campaign.
3. A little nutty like the rest of us … hehe all 18 of us in the mass communication batch were nuts and we had some good times. But ya like me and many others in the batch she was nutty too and very sensitive too.

What are the requirements that you wish from your other half?
Love me for who I am; don’t try to change me and make me into a person that he wants; should at least try to appreciate my work and encourage me for the little good things I do; should miss me; make me feel special, loved and all that etc etc…. hehe just love me a lot basically.

What type of people do you hate the most?
Hate the most huh – well I guess that would be the back stabbers, the liars, and the cheaters mainly. I guess that’s why I don’t have too much sympathy for human beings and love animals more… At least you dog will be loyal to you and give you back love unconditionally.

What is the one thing you can’t live without?
LOVE and CARE! And some more things too like my family and all…

If you have faults, would you rather the people around you point out to you or would you rather they keep quiet?
Well I guess I would want them to point it out to me GENTLY rather than them keeping quiet about it. But I don’t want them to scream about it to me to, just make me understand in a good way...

Are you a shopaholic or not?
hummmm…….hummmmm….I am, I am not, I am, Am not…go figure…..heheh well it depends on my mood too and if given the chance yes I am, but since my parents do tend to point it out, I do control myself too.

Find a word to describe the person who tagged you
Hummm, I don’t think one word is enough…..so many r needed,…but let me at least use 3 words SMART, SWEET, Nuts hehehe….

If you have a chance, which part of your character you would like to change?
Now that is a whooper complicated quest…there r so many things I would like to change… The part that is not self-confident, the part which makes me listen and not react to s**t people put me through, the part which is sarcastic and b****y at times etc.

What’s the last shocking thing you’ve seen or heard?
Don’t remember, I tend to shut such things out of my mind.

Would you rather have love but no money or money but no love?
That’s not a practical question at all. Why is love and money compared? It cannot be at all. I really don’t understand why love n money is always compared…
We do need both to live, having lots of money and no love makes your life empty and likewise having lots of love and no money will make ur life miserable and that will end in losing love…have seen it happen around me too much.

Ok I am not tagging anyone, but whoever would like to take it up can do so. :)

Sunday, October 19, 2008

Mushy, Gooey, Crazy Love???

Warning: Those who think this is too mushy and fake kindly don’t bother reading.

After reading my close buddy’s blog post about her watching the movie “PS: I love you”, I was determined to watch the movie and then later read the book when I get a chance to get my hands on the book. Guess what – I took all the pains to somehow find the movie online, because even after searching in many sites, I couldn’t get hold of it. Finally I got to watch it completely and I have got to say that I’m impressed with the movie. I mean it’s so sweet…damn sweet I say again :)

Well it’s such a sweet kind of love, a concerned love… Don’t tell me that this doesn’t happen in our world. Anyone out there who would like to argue with me about this? Well you absolutely cannot. I tell you this because – (well before I start off, don’t any of you dare think that it’s crazy) I have felt that way about my hubby. I certainly have because unlike me, I know that he finds it very difficult to live without me. I guess in my case even though I’m extremely sensitive, I know to put a hard look in front of others and keep my grief to myself. But my hubby darling, even though he does put a tough look in front of others, he just doesn’t have it in him to live without me.

I know this may sound crazy, but I have seriously thought many times about writing him long letters to prepare him to get over it and move on in life in case anything happens to me. Many a times, I did get the weird feeling that something might happen and I did start out on writing too. But ya me right, I never got to complete it. Well I guess that was coz, I told myself “na nothing is gonna happen, I wanna have a long life with the love of my life.” After all, he did wait for me for all these years and his love did not decrease one bit even after I behaved very badly with him, was extremely rude, made him cry and did all I could to distance him. Even before the wedding and engagement I was in so much of confusion and all that I hurt him over and over and told I do not wanna marry him. But the great guy that he is, he waited very patiently for me, suffered all the hurt and stood by me. He put up with all my really rude behavior and ultimate madness. People he does deserve a huge award for that I say…Coz u cannot even imagine how cruel I was and that a person can be so coldhearted and bad.(Well the circumstances did make me that way I guess!!!)

I know what I did is really bad, but I was also under so much pressure and was going through a lot of problems. And because of people comments, I was so scared and wondering if I was taking the right decision, if I will regret this and so on and many more problems that I really cannot talk about now. Unlike what many others say, we also didn’t just show a false side of ours to each other while we were seeing each other. I made sure that he saw the kind of crazy nut that I am so that later on he cannot regret being married to me. I made sure that he knew what he was getting into and what he will have to put up with… And even after knowing me completely he stuck on!!!

So how can I say that there is no great love? How can I say that such love does not exist when I myself am experiencing it? He is definitely the stable anchor in my life. He did change me in so many ways, stood by me through all my troubles and problems and hysteria when we were seeing each other. Well I know most guys would have run in the opposite direction at full speed when they got the chance to escape. No he did not do that, he waited for me for 7 long years and is still waiting patiently. (Hehe, that’s coz I had to leave India soon after the wedding to get back to work) Ohh Ya Love at first sight does exist too…not for me anyway but for my hubby :P …But I have come to believe in love (I guess) and all that after this…

Guys, it’s so amazing to have a person in life who understands you completely. He understands even the small change in my moods, knows how upset I am, if I’m happy and all that. Well it’s a little freaky too coz even before I know it, he will know exactly how I feel.

Hey just because I told this much does not mean that life is a bed of roses. We still do drive each other nuts, there are things that we still don’t understand and things that make us go mad and disagree and all that. Ohh ya at times I just feel like kicking his ass and killing him too…But amidst all this also, love does exist strongly. If you had seen the fights that we used to have, then all of you would have decided to never marry in life or have a relationship. And you know what; I do have friends who decided never to fall into a relationship and all after seeing our problems and fights. That was the intensity of our fights …LOL

That’s why I feel that if anything at all happens to me, I want him to move on in life, fall in love again, get a good life again etc. I will never stand to see him in mourning or anything. Well I better stop writing this before I make a mess of myself…hehe…Ohh I just pray to the good lord to be with us and guide us through to have a good life. I just thank him for changing me at least this much and making me a better human being and for giving me the best blessing of my life- My darling hubby “D”… Thank U sweet jesus!!!

N.B: I recently got a chance to travel down to India to meet my hubby and guess what - I finally got a chance to buy the book….. I finally bought the Book “PS: I love you”…. Hurreeyyyyy :)

Plot summary
Set in Ireland, Holly Kennedy is beautiful, smart and married to the love of her life - a passionate, funny and impetuous Irishman named Gerry. So when Gerry's life is taken by an illness, it takes the life out of Holly. The only one who can help her is the person who is no longer there. Nobody knows Holly better than Gerry, so it's a good thing he planned ahead. Before he died, Gerry wrote Holly a series of 10 letters that will guide her, not only through her grief but in rediscovering herself. The messages are Gerry's way of informing Holly life goes on. The messages include various tasks and treats Gerry has left for Holly. This is his way of letting her know he will always be there for her. Each letter sends her on a new adventure and each signs off in the same way: "P.S. I Love You." Holly's mother and best friends, Sharon and Denise, begin to worry that Gerry's letters are keeping Holly tied to the past, but, in fact, each letter is pushing her further into a new future. With Gerry's words as her guide, Holly embarks on a journey of rediscovery in a story about marriage, friendship and how a love so strong can turn the finality of death into new beginning for life.